After her scene-stealing theatrical debut in Batman v Superman, Wonder Woman got the limelight all to herself with her own movie in 2017. The movie was a big fat hit with both audiences and critics, grossing over 800 million dollars at the worldwide box office and earning a 93% (as of this writing) on Rotten Tomatoes. Its success was such that it vaulted the then relatively unknown Gal Gadot into the Hollywood A-list as well. After all of that critical and financial success, we were bound to get a sequel eventually. (Not counting her appearance in Justice League, that is.) And three years later, here we are with Wonder Woman 1984.
And while it's been a movie I've been hotly anticipating all year, I also have to admit that it was one of the biggest cinematic disappointments I've seen in a while. There were some things I liked about WW84, as it's called in the movie's promotional material, but it certainly wasn't the spectacle I spent all year hoping for either.
As the title implies, the movie takes us to the year 1984. Calling herself Diana Prince (Gal Gadot) so she can blend in with the world outside Themyscira, she continues to fight crime as "Wonder Woman" while working as an anthropologist at the Smithsonian Institute. She keeps her coworkers at arm's length for the sake of her privacy, but eventually befriends Barbara Minerva (Kristen Wiig), a meek, insecure woman who is constantly overlooked by everyone.
After Wonder Woman breaks up a robbery at a jewelry store, the FBI brings a set of black market antiquities recovered from the robbery to the Smithsonian to be identified. Among these pieces is the Dreamstone, a mysterious gem that is believed to grant the wishes of whomever holds it. This ends up proving true, as both Diana and Barbara inadvertently make wishes that are mystically granted. Barbara becomes as strong, beautiful, and confident as Diana, while Diana's long-dead lover Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) is brought back to life in the body of another man.
The Dreamstone itself was bought on the black market by Maxwell Lord (Pedro Pascal), a failing businessman hoping to use the stone's power to prove that he's not the loser his company's investors believe him to be. He sweet-talks Barbara into letting him into her office, where he acquires the Dreamstone and wishes to become the stone itself.
But the powers of the Dreamstone have one catch: for every wish granted, there is a terrible price to pay. Diana sees her powers becoming diminished, while Barbara's loses all sense of compassion and empathy as her jealousy for Diana consumes her. And as for Maxwell, he travels around the world granting wishes to the rich and powerful so that he can accumulate more power for himself. But his machinations cause so much sociopolitical disruption that it pushes the world to the brink of World War III. Diana and Steve are forced into action, desperate to stop Maxwell before he causes the Cold War to become a nuclear war.
Santa Claus left a big pile of mediocrity and disappointment in my stocking this Christmas, and it came wrapped in a big box labeled "Wonder Woman 1984." As much as the first movie got right, the sequel gets just as much wrong. It's unnecessarily long, much of the special effects are questionable, and the worst part of all is that it's just kinda dull. I honestly hate to say it, but with the exception of the cast, Wonder Woman 1984 is a wholly unremarkable movie.
There's no one specific thing about Wonder Woman 1984 that drags it down, but rather several things that combine into a big cocktail of letdown. Let's start, as I usually do, with the direction. Behind the camera once again is Patty Jenkins, who I'd hoped would be able to replicate the magic of the first movie. But alas, the sequel suffers from an inconsistent pacing that leads to long stretches where nothing happens and action scenes that are nowhere near as thrilling or awe-inspiring as the ones we saw in 2017.
The movie is 151 minutes long, and there is absolutely no reason for it to be that long. Watching it at home on a streaming device or a tablet is one thing, since you can at least fast forward during the dull parts. But you shouldn't have to do that. After a prologue that sees a young Diana competing in a race on Themyscira (an 11-minute sequence that should've been no more than five if it had to be in the movie at all), we have a scene where Diana stops a robbery at a mall before the movie slows to a crawl for the rest of the first hour. Things perk up a little around the 45-minute mark when Chris Pine enters the movie, but so little happens for such a long period that it's easy to tune out for much of the first half of the movie.
The movie also suffers from some of the worst special effects I've seen in a long time. There's the obvious usage of green screens, shots of Diana running that look like someone is learning how to use a marionette, and a few moments where the Lasso of Truth looks like a glowing golden cartoon. And let's not forget a scene where Diana saves some kids from being ran over during a car chase, and the kids are as fake as fake can get. It looks like Diana is swinging in and rescuing that marionette I was talking about a few sentences ago.
As I was sorting through the notes I'd written as my prep for this review, I saw discussions on social media and Reddit debating that the bad effects may be intentional, that they're supposed to make the movie be something of a throwback to Christopher Reeve's Superman movies from the '80s. I'm not sure if I believe that because the movie being set in 1984 becomes completely irrelevant about halfway into the movie. Yeah, the President looks kinda sorta like Ronald Reagan, Maxwell Lord looks kinda sorta like Donald Trump circa 1984, there's the fashion and a reference to the "Star Wars" missile defense system. But they never really lean into the '80s aesthetic. Stranger Things and the 2007 version of It do a way better job of capturing that vibe.
I also have to question the strength of the movie's screenplay. Credited to Jenkins, Dave Callaham, and renowned comic book writer Geoff Johns, the script is best described as "weak." The story isn't nearly strong enough to support the long running time, and the characters aren't done any justice either. Everything feels paint-by-numbers, with no real passion behind anything.
And I had more issues with the script beyond that. For starters, I wish they'd done something crazy with the whole wishes thing. Am I to believe that nobody wished for something really stupid or bizarre? Couldn't we get at least one throwaway gag where somebody wished for a pet dinosaur? Or wish that their dog could talk? We did have one brief moment where we see someone wished to be a farmer and got a herd of cattle in the park across from his apartment building, but things could've been a lot more off the wall. Sure, it might've ended up like that one episode of Supernatural from 2008 where a little girl wished for her teddy bear to be alive. But I'd have laughed my butt off if they'd done something ridiculous with it.
I also felt conflicted about Barbara Minerva, whom comic book fans know as "Cheetah." Not only is the character written like a half-assed version of Michelle Pfeiffer's Catwoman in Batman Returns, but I couldn't find any real redeeming qualities for the character. There's no catharsis factor when Diana eventually defeats her in their climactic battle, because there's literally nothing to Cheetah other than "she's a loser that turned into a jealous mega-bitch." There's nothing deep or complex about her. Maxwell Lord at least has a young son that he adores, but is blinded by his greed. Cheetah has nothing beyond her own selfishness and envy. That's why I said there's no catharsis, because we never get to see any chinks in her armor, never get to see anything that could redeem her.
That said, there's one scene near the beginning of the movie where she gives a dinner plate to a homeless man she's friendly with. The man turns up later when she beats up an attempted rapist, but none of this adds anything to Cheetah's arc since it's never referenced beyond these two brief moments. The Dreamstone stealing all of Cheetah's empathy and compassion feels hollow when when we only get to see it for about ten seconds. And to be honest, you probably could've cut her out of the movie entirely and outside of one scene where she helps Maxwell avoid being captured by Wonder Woman, it wouldn't have hindered the movie in the slightest. It just seems like they wanted someone for Wonder Woman to physically fight, and that was it.
Another thing that I thought was weird was that throughout the movie, Wonder Woman saves numerous people and asks them not to tell anyone about her. She played a role in World War I, with pictures of her to prove it. Am I to believe that nobody has ever told anyone else about the gorgeous woman with superpowers in the sixty-six years between the first movie's events and WW84? At one point we see a picture of Diana with an elderly lady I'm assuming is Etta Candy from the first movie, and I'm supposed to believe that nobody asked why Etta's friend hasn't aged a day since 1918?
If she pulled a "Connor MacLeod in Highlander" and kept a low profile while changing identities every so often so nobody noticed her, that'd be one thing. But when you're running around fighting crime with a glowing golden lasso while wearing a red and blue Xena: Warrior Princess costume, that's not exactly keeping a low profile. Maybe she pulled some strings and got her participation in the war buried and didn't break out the Wonder Woman stuff again until just before the events of WW84, I don't know. The whole thing just seems a little odd to me, y'know?
And then there's the climax itself. There's a moment where Diana delivers a soliloquy about how beautiful and important the truth is. It's framed in such a way that it looks like she's speaking directly to the audience, and combined with the hamfisted dialogue, it's all quite awkward. It feels like they were trying to sneak in an indictment of the whole "fake news" thing that's popped up over the last few years. And even if it isn't, it feels very forced, and it damn near took me out of the movie altogether. And honestly, the whole "Gal Gadot talking to the camera about how lying is bad" thing is a really stupid way to end your superhero movie.
But at least the cast is strong despite the less-than-stellar writing. Kristen Wiig's casting still feels odd to me, considering she's primarily known for her work in comedy. It'd be like hiring Kate McKinnon to play a villain in a horror movie. But Wiig isn't bad at all, being especially good during Cheetah's awkward, nerdy phase. And while it's odd seeing her play a selfish bitch that's consumed with envy, Wiig pulls it off well.
Chris Pine, meanwhile, returns to the role of Steve Trevor and once again does a great job. He and Gal Gadot have an electric chemistry together, and his awe at seeing the evolution of aeronautics and discovering that space travel had been invented is adorable.
I also really liked Pedro Pascal as Maxwell Lord. He plays the character like a drug addict that's hooked on power, so much so that it's literally killing him. But he needs that next fix, that next rush, that next bit of anything that will make him feel whole. Pascal is awesome in the role; the fact that villains quite like Maxwell Lord aren't that common in superhero movies helps him give a unique performance that I was really impressed by.
And last but most certainly not least is Gal Gadot. A few dodgy line readings aside, Gadot once again shows why she was the perfect actress to play Wonder Woman. She is utterly fabulous as the all-loving, kindhearted idealist and ferocious warrior. Gadot is wasted playing the role in such a mediocre movie, something that makes me wish WW84 had been better and hoping that a third movie that improves on this one's mistakes can be made in the near future. Gadot and the character deserve so much better.
Truth be told, the audience deserves better as well. You want people to sign up for HBO Max or go to a theater on Christmas Day (and during a global pandemic, no less) to see your movie, and this is the best you can give them? I know DC doesn't have the best cinematic track record over the last decade or so, but the first Wonder Woman movie was so fantastic that one would be justified in getting their hopes up for a sequel. And it sucks seeing that sequel squander all of its potential by being such a colossal disappointment. Of all the ways to close out the terrible year that was 2020, I'd have liked to have ended it with a good movie. But we didn't get it with Wonder Woman 1984. Here's hoping that 2021 will be better, and that Warner Bros. and DC can come up with something to redeem Wonder Woman in the future
Final Rating: **
