It was seven years ago that Zack Snyder brought us the movie 300, his second directorial effort. Based on Frank Miller's comic book of the same name, the movie was a big fat hit and has been hailed by some as being one of the best "guy flicks" of the new millennium. And now, seven years later, someone thought it was time to follow up on 300's success with a sequel. I don't know why it took the better part of a decade to get around to it, but then I don't work in Hollywood, so what do I know? Regardless, 300: Rise of an Empire is a shameless cash-in several years too late, and it's an amazingly bad movie to boot. If you were thinking of seeing it, be warned: it's a waste of time, of effort, and of your money.
With King Leonidas leading his three hundred Spartan warriors into battle at Thermopylae, the Athenian general Themistocles (Sullivan Stapleton) leads his navy in fighting the Persians at sea. And much like Leonidas, Themistocles is up against what seems like insurmountable odds. The Persian navy not only outnumbers them, but is led by the vicious Artemisia (Eva Green), who assisted Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro) in his rise to the Persian throne after Themistocles killed his father at the Battle of Marathon. Finding he and his navy in an unenviable situation where brute force is out of the question and victory itself may not be an option, Themistocles tries his valiantly to form a strategy that could have an ending in his favor.
I entered 300: Rise of an Empire not expecting much. At best, I was simply hoping for a fun, inoffensive way to kill two hours on a Saturday afternoon. But I was astounded by just how lousy the movie is. It feels like it should have gone direct-to-DVD or premiered on cable instead of getting a theatrical release. The movie is substandard on practically every level, with so few positive elements that one couldn't be blamed for missing them altogether. And honestly, I can say the same thing about this whole movie. If you choose not to see it, you won't miss anything, and you'll be better off for it.
The movie was directed by Noam Murro, a filmmaker whom I've never heard of previously. And honestly, I'm unimpressed. It feels like Murro's efforts were just a dull copy of what Zack Snyder did with the original 300. His attempts at replicating Snyder's style are inadequate at best, lacking the ultra-macho, testosterone-fueled machismo of the first movie. And the action sequences, which you'd think would be the movie's biggest selling point other than it being a 300 sequel, are all lackluster, uninspired, and mostly kinda boring. There's no life, no spark to be found. I honestly just wanted the movie to hurry up and be done.
I was also disappointed in places with the 3D effects. There are some moments where it looks really cool and adds some serious pop, but it often feels unnecessary. A lot of the time, the action is moving so quickly that the 3D doesn't add anything to the movie. One gets the feeling that, like a lot of movies, the 3D was added only to jack up the ticket price at the box office and make the movie a few extra dollars.
And then there's the script, credited to Snyder and Kurt Johnstad, is pretty lame too. It's based on Frank Miller's graphic novel Xerxes, itself an unpublished follow-up to his 300 comic, and if this movie is any indication, there might be a reason Xerxes hasn't been published yet. The dialogue is banal and corny as hell, the characters are clichéd, and the plot feels like a cut-and-paste of the first movie, only set at sea. Could this have honestly been the best Snyder and Johnstad have done? Because if it is, then all I can do is throw my hands up and wonder aloud why they even bothered at all.
Even the cast is a mixed bag. The majority of the movie's actors are forgettable, and even lead actor Sullivan Stapleton is about as dull as you can get. Stapleton doesn't have anything even resembling Gerard Butler's charisma or passion, making one long for King Leonidas instead of Themistocles. It's not all bad, though, with Lena Headey once again providing a fine performance as Sparta's Queen Gorgo despite being sadly underutilized. The real highlight of the cast, though, is Eva Green, who is fantastic as she plays Artemisia as a cold, heartless, bloodthirsty bitch. Much like Butler was the highlight of the first 300, Green makes Rise of an Empire worth seeing for her crazed, anger-filled performance.
But not even Green could save this movie. It's inconsistent, often boring, badly written, and is honestly just a poor movie all around. I meant it earlier when I said that 300: Rise of an Empire was a needless sequel that only seems to have been made to cash in on the original's success. But I still have no idea why they couldn't have come up with something better in the intervening seven years. I mean, it couldn't have been that hard... could it?
Final Rating: *½
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